Missing My Angel Baby

Wednesday 6.29.11
I dropped Ryiah off this morning at 5am at the airport with her dad. She is taking her first trip to Kentucky with him. She'll be gone for one week. ONE WEEK! In my opinion...it's too long. She's too young. I'm not good with it, but I'm trying my hardest to accept it and be positive. Ryiah loves and adores her daddy, so that is not my concern. My concerns are those I won't write about but will try to come to terms with and accept.
For a week before she left I tried to prepare her mentally for the trip. I told her how much fun she was going to have and all the things daddy was going to do with her. I also tried to get her to understand that I would not be going with her. I needed her to get that. All week long I told her, "You are going to see daddy and mommy is staying home." "Mommy will not be there with you. It's just you and daddy." "Mommy will not be there." These things were snuck into our conversations when talking about how much fun she was going to have. When she would talk about the trip she would say, "I'm going to see daddy all by myself. You aren't coming with me mommy. You stay home and I'll see you soon because you are not going to Kentucky with me." So she got it. Right? Sounds like it...until we were getting in the truck to go to the airport and I loaded her bag. She looked around and with a concerned look asked, "Mommy, where's your suitcase? Go get it. We are leaving." That's when I had my first moment of misty eyes. I don't like to cry in front of her about these things so I held it together. The whole way to the airport I continued to tell her how much fun she'd have with daddy and that I had to stay home to work. As soon as she saw her daddy she jumped in his arms and kissed me goodbye with no problem. *tear...me, not her*
So she left. This morning I had made it to the airport, stopped by the bank, played 5 people in Words With Friends, done a load of laundry, cleaned my bathroom, folded and put away a pile of clothes and unloaded and put away a suitcase full of things Ryiah did not take with her... all before 6:30am! Clearly I was trying to keep everything off my mind. The rest of the day went okay. I felt like Ry was just over at a friend's house. I turned my music up and was able to work, clean , lay out, eat, blog and just be...all with ease and stress free. So the pro to all of this is getting things done! ;)
The only truly hard part of the day was talking to Ryiah before she went to bed. I told her to have her daddy read to her and she cried and said she wanted me to. She broke down and cried and said she missed me. That was rough. I should be able to swoop in and comfort her and I couldn't. That is the worst feeling in the world.

Thursday 6.30.11

Today was okay. I started to dejunk (it's a word in my dictionary) Ry's room. How does a two year accumulate so much crap? I got a massage which started off like heaven then fell flat in the end. It was still worth it. I went running for over an hour. Apparently Ryiah caught fireflies! Sean sent me a picture of her actually holding one! What the heck? This girl is scared of bugs to no end! Maybe her dad is curing her of it, but this picture alone creeps me out! RYIAH! PUT THAT BUG DOWN!!!

Fiday 7.1.1

Today I hit a bit of a funk. A few other things played into other than Ryiah being gone, but that was a big part of it. I had plans to go out with friends and things kind of fell apart. So I started thinking mabe I would just crawl in bed and call it good. Then my good friend, Kaili, pulled me out of it! She is truly one of the funniest people I know. We ended up going out and having so much fun. Thank you, Kaili for being you! While we were out Ryiah called me and I talked to her for 5-10 minutes. She is having lot s of fun with her dad and staying very busy! Before she hung up I asked her to sing me a song. She choose to sing the song that I made up for her and have been singing to her since she was born! It's called ''Ryiah Bel My Angel''. She sang it word for word and perfectly. That's when the tears came. I love her and miss her so much!

Saturday 7.2.11

Today was good! I stayed busy with work and then went to Charlies! I have to thank a very good friend for introducing me to the Charming Charlie's! It is truly the cutest boutique ever! The best part about it is that it's not that expensive and they have everything! I'm definitely addicted to Charlie. Now...if I only had extra $$$. Hmph.

Ryiah said that she went to the movies with her daddy and saw Cars 2. Then they got to watch fireworks. Ryiah said, "I got to see fireworks and they were so loud so I cried. They scared me and I cried. I don't like fireworks." Poor thing! I'm super sad that I don't get to spend the holiday with her. :( As we were talking on the phone before she went to bed I asked her to sing me a song. She chose Mary Had A Little Lamb. She started off strong then started getting quieter and quieter and then there was silence. Sean said she was out. She fell asleep while singing to me! Haha! I love that girl. I guess that's proof that she's keeping busy!

Sunday 7.3.11

I took off to Huntington Beach this morning. I needed to get away so I didn't have Ryiah on the brain! It was perfect. Huntington is beautiful, the people are laid back and so chill, the feeling is just all around good. I ended up meeting up with a friend and hung out pretty much the entire weekend. We went to LA to the Griffith Observatory where they show a movie about how the world, universe and galaxies are made from a scientific standpoint. It was pretty awesome! The view of the city from there is amazing! If the smog didn't ruin it you would be able to see from one end to the other! On our way back to Huntington we stopped at this place called Diddy Riese's Cookies. All I can say is that the 30 minute wait in line was SOOO worth it! It was one of the best pieces of heaven here on earth!

Monday 7.4.11

We went downtown Huntington and watched to 4th of July parade. It was great! So many people just having a good time and not worrying about anything else! After that, I needed some solo time so I took a drive up the PCH and back. I parked the car and walked a couple miles down the beach as I people watched and tried to sort a few things out in my head. I didn't get much sorting done, but I did come to the conclusion that, at that point, my life was good. That night was fireworks! So after taking time out of our "oh so busy" schedule of hanging out all day long, we got in the hot tub to relax before heading to the beach to see the show. We ended up jumping on a beach cruiser (just one...I rode on the handle bars) and taking off in a rush so we didn't miss the firework show! It was awesome! I'm thinking I need HB every 4th of July!

See...it took my mind off of the fact that Ry wasn't with me! She was having a blast with her dad!

Tuesday 7.5.11

Today after getting a bite to eat and walking down the pier I headed home. It was 3 1/2 hours of time trying to gain perspective of a few things and trying not to dwell on Ryiah being so far away. I miss her. A lot.

Wednesday 7.6.11

My last day without Ryiah! I feel like I should be up and out and playing for a the entire day. Instead ~ I'm counting down the minutes until I get to see my little angel baby. I can't wait to hold her and squeeze those squishy cheeks!

She is here! The best feeling in the world was when Ryiah wrapped her little arms and legs around me and held on so tight. I was half worried that she would see me and realize she wanted to go back to KY! Not the case! She DID miss me! She loved on me the whole way home and then the entire time I tried to get her jammies on and get her into bed. I'm so grateful for her and all the love and joy she brings into my life. I'm so happy that she had a good experience with her dad. I feel like she is a year older! She is bigger, her hair seems longer and, although it sounds crazy, she is speaking even more clearly and in a more mature manner than when she left! So crazy what one week will do to you! I'm incredibly happy to have my sweet angel back!!!